birdie's Podcast

Another great podcast hosted by LibSyn.com

Sat, 2 June 2007
Ghost Products in the Sky
This is my musical goodbye to Avon. Sing-a-long if you like!

Ghost Products in the Sky
by Birdie Jaworski

A catalogue was coming out one dark and windy day,
but I don't care, 'cause that's not where I'll ever get my pay.
Now don't you know, that every time those shiny products came,
I hustled Avon everywhere, that's how I got my fame.

Some brands ain't got no fire, and their lines have no appeal.
My manager assured me that ol' Avon was sooo real.
A bolt of fear went through me when I knocked on that first door.
But truth be told it got too old, I couldn't push no more.

Yipie Yi-ay.... Yipee Yi-oh..... Ghost Products In The Sky.....

Once I wrote a thousand words of things gone right and wrong,
I showed a brand new universe with every ding and dong.
Avon is the greatest, won't you buy my products please.
Avon is a lifestyle, the new recruit believes.

Yipee Yi-ay.... Yipee Yi-oh..... Ghost Products In The Sky.....

I talked a million women into selling Lift and Tuck,
they trusted me to tell the truth so they could make a buck,
and sure enough, they moved the stuff, and Avon's bottom line
increased in size, Bust Sculpt applied to every single dime.

Yipee Yi-ay.... Yipee Yi-oh..... Ghost Products In The Sky.....

I did my best for Avon, made it fun, something to try,
but when I checked my e-mail, I let out a great big sigh.
Avon never told me that my stories did them good,
but I kept writing anyway, because I thought I should.

Yipee Yi-ay.... Yipee Yi-oh..... Ghost Products In The Sky.....

Now Avon did a lot for me, in ways they'll never know,
or understand, or comprehend, like where I get my glow.
It's not from any product, any "thing" that I apply.
My customers, taught to me, there's more than sell and buy.

Yipee Yi-ay.... Yipee Yi-oh..... Ghost Products In The Sky.....

That catalogue's now fadin' in the sun, I'm glad to say.
My lipstick's left my holster and my blush has gone astray.
Ladies, listen to me, when I tell you what I know,
Skin So Soft can coat your legs, don't let it coat your soul.


Yipee Yi-ay.... Yipee Yi-oh..... Ghost Products In The Sky.....


Direct download: ghostproducts.mp3
Category: Avon -- posted at: 2:03 AM
Comments[91]
    Hysterical! I found your blog by googling "What am I going to do with 400 Avon catalogs??"

    I am a new Avon lady, a maverick in my own right, and a fellow writer as well! I order my stuff onlne and accidentally ended up with 2 batches of 20 sets of 10--half in English and half in Spanish--and thought, Whattheheck! Let's have some fun here; lessee...how many garages and brake shops and lube joints can I find? I'm going to hand a catalog to every grease monkey I can locate, beginning with my mechanic. They have wives or sweethearts who would appreciate a smallish gift of beauty or fun once in awhile. Then I'm going to hit up the high-priced lawyers and doctors and dentists. The 'no-soliciting' sign doesn't bother me because I don't say a word. I just stop and drop.

    My biz cards are home-made, and have the following on the reverse of the 'beauty company' info: "We the willing, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have done so much for so many for so long, we are now qualified to do anything with nothing."

    I hope to have fun, to make enough to finance my other business, and to make people laugh. Please, whatever you do, don't let this site die

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